I am still in love with my highschool sweetheart. I've been in love with him since he was 15. I've always had him in my heart, he knew me before I was me, he broke my heart, he is the one I still love deeply.
When he went off to college, I knew he was going to own the world. He was going to grab it by the balls and make it his.
Almost 30 years after I fell in love with him, we are still connected. We share a bond that is unique, that transcends miles, that has no explanation, that defies logic. I have loved him all my life, in all my lifetimes and those still to come. It just is.
It makes me happy to be able to share my life and that of my children with him. To have shared my daughter's prom with him, to have been able to hold his hand during her graduation and to share my son's first homecoming. I was comforted by his voice when my son ran away, when my daughter's cutting got out of control, I can share with him the mellow nature of my youngest and he was the first person I was ever able to be honest with about my eating disorder.
He and I got into mischief together as teenagers, (I think he got into more than I did,), but I can share those stories with my children and they know who I'm talking about, and they can see who mom used to be.
He is the sane, mellow, patient, compassionate one in our friendship, while I'm the insane, illogical, impulsive one. He guides me down from my impulsive decisions, he knows who I am and has infinite patience with my temper and my outbursts.
I love the sound of his voice. I love the warmth and comfort in it when I talk to him. Actually, I love everything about him, down to the core of his soul. And I love him because of who he is. He has no malice in his heart, he is a beautiful person who cares deeply about those he loves.
It makes me happy to be able to have him in my life, as my best friend, as my sounding board, as someone I wish I could be; loving, compassionate, kind and patient.
Thank you for being in my life.
Namaste.
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